I Lost

woman wearing blue dress with umbrella during sunset
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I lost
People I thought I would have forever.
I lost
Chats and talks I thought I would always have.
I lost
Though how do I get it all back, and do I even want it all back?
Socially impaired.
No idea how to make or keep friends.
Socially Impaired. 
With the world so busy, and my mind so confused.
Socially impaired. 
In this world of confusion. 

How do you move an acquaintance to a friend or a friend to a good friend? 
How does one keep friends and how does one make friends?
I lost a sense of myself and my own desires. 
I lost the nuances and gestures that help others to figure this out. 

I was lost, but now I am found. 
I Found
Strength in myself that I will have forever. 
I found 
Chats and talks I will have forever. 
I found
I love that will not quit and I never have to wonder where it went.

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How Long Do You Wait?

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How Long Do You Wait?

How long do you wait?

The agonizing silence.

The dread and dismay you feel as you wonder what went wrong.

The gloom and desperation you feel as you reach out to nothing. 

How long do you wait?

The harrowing silence. 

Dejection and grief you feel as you wonder what went wrong.

The sadness and heartache you feel as you reach out to nothing. 

The silence rings in your ears as you feel nothing. 

You reach out and grasp but it is only figments of what was. 

Always Alone

alone

Photo by Keenan Constance on Unsplash 





Good Friends

Photo by Aritfur Rahman on Unsplash

Good Friends

What do you want from a good friend?

What do you expect from a good friend?

A friend should always have your back.

A friend should stand by you and support you.

However, a good friend will support you,

They will also tell you when you are wrong. 

They call you out and give you advice, 

Even if it’s not what you want to hear.

Good friends should be treasured.

Good friends are hard to find.

Don’t be angry with them for telling you the truth.

Be thankful for they are the only ones who truly care.

Support (A Poem About Supporting Others)

Support I give and rarely receive.

How is it the ones closest to you,

Are the ones who don’t support you?

Strangers give you praise and those you love

Wonder why they should.

Why can’t we praise people and support those we love?

Are we only there to support, when times are rough?

Why are those in your corner, not truly there for you?

When they have so much to give when your cards are down, 

But nothing when you achieve your goals. 

I Was Wrong

Photo by Keenan Constance on Unsplash

I Was Wrong

I thought they were my friends.

I thought I was important.

I thought they would support me, 

But alas, I was wrong.

I cherished the memories,

I cherished our talks,

I cherished our friendship,

But alas, I was wrong to cherish these things.

In the end, it never mattered.

In the end, it is all gone.

In the end, I am alone.

To Keep a Promise

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To Keep a Promise

A promise is something sweet,

A caring gesture of friendship and love.

Sincere thoughts and a heartfelt vow,

A pledge of honor and faith.

When promises brake and friendships shattered,

You blackened your heart with lies.

How far do you go to recapture that trust?

What will you do to regain that love?

The vow and the faith you once had,

Why do you keep your promise when others do not?

Should you mend something that’s broken?

How do you fix the friendship all in ruins,

A trust that is a dilapidated mess?

How far will you go to keep a promise of a friendship long gone?

The darkness pours over my soul

The darkness pours over my soul

The darkness pours over my soul

As endless waves rush in.

The rising of the tide pulls me in further. 

Pulling my heart and filling it with dread. 

I found myself caught in the tide, while my body struggles to be free.

The darkness shrouds my existence, and soon I am gasping for air. 

The dark waters pulling me down, filling my lungs with regret and despair.

I reach out trying to break the surface, but the darkness is always there. 

Pulling me back, pulling me down to the depths, I plummet. 

The pressure keeps me down, night after night, day after day,

I can’t see the light, the darkness is all I know.

Throw my feelings in the trash and stomp all over them!

 

 

trashPhoto by Antoine GIRET on Unsplash

 

Do my feelings not matter to you?

Do you think you can do what you want?

Screw me, because I don’t matter!

Throw my feelings in the trash and stomp all over them!

 

Did you even think to talk to me?

Did you think I wouldn’t care?

Did you even think of me?

 

I know you didn’t think of me!

I know no one does!

 

It’s better to not expect anything from anyone!

They always disappoint!

I expect too much from people and I am the one who gets hurt.

 

Did you even think to talk to me?

Did you think I wouldn’t care?

Did you even think of me?

 

Throw my feelings in the trash and stomp all over them!

Am I Your Friend

friend

Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash

 


Am I your friend?

Do you really care about me the way I care about you?

We use the terms best friends of is that just me?

But is that truly what I am to you?

 

Do I think more of you than you think of me?

When my usefulness is gone, will you also leave?

Why do these questions haunt me so?

 

I worry about the future, like an endless sea of doubt. 

Doubting myself and others, will I ever be happy.