Ramblings of a Chaotic Mind (NEW BOOK)

Ramblings of a Chaotic Mind
This is a collection of poems, thoughts, short stories, and art. I hope you enjoy them.

Many of my poems might be dark and depressing, but writing is how I cope with things life throws at us. When I’m frustrated, hurt, and sad, I write. It helps me cope with my feelings though not every poem will fit this description most of them will.

I write on a slew of subjects; motherhood, family, miscarriage, children, raising children and many more. Sometimes moms get into a competition of who’s the better mother or who has the best kids, whose job is hard, and that mindset helps no one. I promise to be as real as I can, hoping the things that have challenged me can help someone else.

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Women Need to Support Other Women

Women rarely support each other.  It is hard to find women that support each other.  

When I was in school, kids bullied me.  My mom was the sick mom with cancer and we didn’t have a lot of money, My clothes were old and torn. Since then I had low self-esteem.

I found later that writing was something I loved. And when I found Roleplay,  I made friends fast, and I didn’t believe it. Someone told me I was their best friend, and I took a long time to believe it. Because who wants me as a best friend?

When it comes to Role Play, it seems a lot of women think they must be the center of attention.  In a role play, you can be anyone you want to be. I find people change who they are and use fake profiles because they are not happy with themselves.

Role Play is best when you let people be creative. We’ve had some awesome plots that were not created by admins. My friend Breen created two plots that were amazing. I know will blush if she reads this but its true. 

Women should be supporting each other and encouraging each other. We should take a step back and allow others to have the spotlight on them.

Of course, this goes beyond writing and role-playing and into everything we do. Women need to support each other and lift each other up instead of tearing each other down.

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I Lost a Friend Today

silhouette photo of woman against during golden hour
Photo by Jill Wellington on Pexels.com
I Lost a Friend Today
I lost a friend today.
I should feel sad,
But I don’t.

I lost a friend today.
I should be sad, 
But I am glad.

Words were exchanged,
And I held my own.
Words were exchanged,
And I held my own.

No matter who you are,
There is a time and a place.
Friends should support others.
Those closest to you, should support you.
When they don’t it is time to remove them from your life.

Everyone in your boat may not be rowing for you, but against you.
As your success grows, their loyalty fades.
They would rather push you down, then see you succeed.

So today I lost a friend,
And I am happy!

But I wish it were easier to make and keep friends. 
Maybe there is something wrong with me.

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Always Alone

woman looking at sea while sitting on beach
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com
As much as I give, I lose.
As much as I care, they don’t.

How do you know how important you are?
Do I think more of you than you think of me?
I am hopeless and alone, always and forever

As much as I help, it’s never enough.
As much as I love, I hurt.

I am not important and never have been.
To those I care about, they care little for me.
I am hopeless and alone, always and forever.

I am the one who gets tossed aside, forgotten each time.
A new thing comes along.

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Good Friends

Photo by Aritfur Rahman on Unsplash

Good Friends

 What do you want from a good friend?
What do you expect from a good friend?

A friend should always have your back.
A friend should stand by you and support you.

However, a good friend will support you,
They will also tell you when you are wrong. 

They call you out and give you advice, 
Even if it’s not what you want to hear.

Good friends should be treasured.
Good friends are hard to find.
Don’t be angry with them for telling you the truth.
Be thankful for they are the only ones who truly care.

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Time to Move on

monochrome photo of couple holding hands
Photo by Min An on Pexels.com
I hang on longer than most. 
My hands will bleed, blisters will form.
Scraps and cuts do not bother me.
But once I am done, I will not go back.

My skin is torn, there is blood on my shirt.
My grip is tight, it strains my arms.
I call out for help, as the grip loosens.
But once I am done,  I will not return.

It might take several times, it might take years. 
The scars will heal, the blisters fade, but the memory lives on.
 I hold on again, but I do not stay long. 
But once I am done, there is not going back,

I hung on longer than you did.
My hands bleed and the blisters broke, 
But once that branch breaks, I am done.

You can only hang on to people for so long.
Before you lose your grip. 
You look at your hands and remember how pretty they were,
Before the blood, scars and blisters.
You remember how happy you were once, 
And you know it is time to move on. 

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This is the link. https://discord.gg/af2vaM2Z

Still in early stages, but there is a channel called suggestions. That if someone wants a new channel you can ask for it there.
We are a role play, writers resource group. For anyone who loves reading and those who love writing. Poetry/fiction/nonfiction/ and anything else you want. Promote your own books, blogs, role plays, and more. Artists and writers are all welcome!

We have channels for writers, readers and move.

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Support (A Poem About Supporting Others)

 Support I give and rarely receive.
How is it the ones closest to you,
Are the ones who don’t support you?
Strangers give you praise and those you love
Wonder why they should.
Why can’t we praise people and support those we love?
Are we only there to support, when times are rough?
Why are those in your corner, not truly there for you?
When they have so much to give when your cards are down, 
But nothing when you achieve your goals. 

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Role Play

I love role playing. It lets me write and be creative while working out ideas for stories. Sometimes when I have writers block on a book, I can go to one of my RP groups and write something completely different.

One part to new members!
Freedom means you are free to create your own plots & ideas. Admins will not create plots for you. You are free to be creative. Our story is ongoing, so as long as it fits in the story, you can go for it. Come Roleplay Marvel/DC/Fantasy Characters and more. We are not a once upon a time group.


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